THE JOY OF TECH: A relationship manual - How to create a GOOD working relationship with your new machine colleague!

As we all learn to realise, the best relationships in life are those that are mutually beneficial. The ones that last and are joyful are those where there is a connection, and where there is an enduring partnership of strengths and talents.  As we individually and globally embark on a rapid learning curve as we connect with new technologies, it could be useful to apply relationship intelligence to ensure the optimum outcome.  Because divorcing our phones could feel quite painful for many of us!

We can see this relationship intelligence at work in nature. Rather than a parasitic relationship (where one feeds off the other to the others detriment) the sustainable ones are the symbiotic ones where both parties benefit from being with the other. The most famous example is the clownfish (Nemo!) and the sea anemone: the fish is protected from other predators and the anemone is kept clean from infection. Unlike other species, the clownfish adapted to have a protective coating on its skin to enable this relationship to work.

This could parallel with how we relate to the machines in our life. Since the invention of the wheel, us humans have developed technologies that reduce the dull, dirty, dangerous tasks in life (just think about how construction safety practice has moved on from when the Ancient Egyptians built the Pyramids). By capturing and storing the data in our lives we also now have unprecedented opportunity to reduce the monotonous, routine or low-value aspects of our lives.  The weekly shop that previously took hours out of a weekend? With supermarket shopping apps, a repeat order can be made in seconds.

Lets remember that the wheel was invented to help us, not tell us where to go! Just like the newer technologies, we need to ensure we have a good sense of how we relate with all our apps, screens and speakers in order to enjoy a healthy friendship that is good for us. The more data we provide our machines, the more they benefit by learning about us and helping us to make more discoveries about the wonders of our world and our people. But we are not there to stare at it for hours and get fatigued by giving it all of our time and attention. That’s for the AI’s to do! So like with Nemo, we may need to adapt a new coating to the way we relate with our machines to ensure that overall this is GOOD for us.

SO: About to start using a new app/machine/online tool? Here are some handy hints to help start what could be a new beautiful relationship that benefits you and your life: 

Building a GOOD relationship with the technology in your life.

Ground rules: in order to maintain the best dynamic you need to set the plan... What is your vision for a successful working relationship with your new kit? How much of your energy and attention are you prepared to give

Outcome: this kit should help you achieve your goals (not the other way round) so what is the specific role you need it to play?

Own: how do you want your skills to be enhanced through this? e.g if you are paid to think and make decisions, when specifically in the task chain will your distinct skill need to step up and in?

Decide: what and when will be your triggers for challenging the way in which you are relating with your tech e.g. if you find yourself using it at 3am on a Sunday

Laura Thomson-Staveley is founder and leadership coach at Phenomenal Training and co-host of Secrets from A Coach podcast. For more information visit: phenomenaltraining.com and secretsfromacoach.com